Tuesday, October 7, 2014

Am I the only one who doesn't want to dress like a French girl?

I swear, if I read one more article telling me how to dress/look/act/love like a French woman, I may blow a gasket.
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On the one hand, I get why women, particularly American women, are so fascinated by the "French way" of doing things. France, and Paris in particular, has always seemed glamourous, cosmopolitan, the center of universe when it comes to fashion. Honestly, where would our fashion vocabulary be without the word chic?
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This isn't me doing some American thing where I call French people cheese eating surrender monkeys, and I'm not even implying that there's something wrong with French style. Like a lot of women, I love Brigitte Bardot's style, and Catherine Deneuve's; one of my favorite bloggers is the stunning Miss Pandora, who is very French and very stylish. I think the issue is less with French style than with how it's perceived. Paris fashion week just passed, and all of the "How to ______ like a French girl" articles are getting under my skin a little bit.
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What frustrates me about it is that in order to be chic like a French women (according to the things that I've read), you have to spend a lot of time and effort looking like you rolled out of bed 10 minutes before you left the house. It's one thing not to want to spend a lot of time or effort on your appearance; it's another thing to have this carefully crafted sense of artlessness that you have to constantly work to maintain.
Let's start with body image. There is literally a book called French Women Don't Get Fat, which kind of makes you wonder what life must be like for French women who do get fat. According to this BBC article, it's pretty tough. Part of this has to do, I think, with the notion that it should be easy to stay slim - eat small portions of rich foods, include lots of produce in your diet, walk for exercise. In reality, the dieting industry in France is huge, and in a culture that's synonymous with excellent food, you don't have to indulge that much to end up gaining weight. Since so few people will admit the effort that goes into maintaining a slim physique, being overweight seems to carry an extra sense of shame.
French style and beauty seems to involve the same principle. You see the word "effortless" again and again, but what does that even mean? I'm sure there are women out there that really can just roll out of bed looking fabulous, but I haven't met either of them. Even some of the articles admit that there's a lot of prep work involved in looking effortless - getting a great haircut, buying expensive products for your skin, making sure you stay thin so your classic and chic wardrobe hangs off of you just so.
My issue with that, really, is just that I don't think there's anything wrong with looking like you're trying. This whole effortless schtick is so unrealistic, and weirdly Machivellian. What's wrong with looking like you spent some time thinking about what you were going to wear today? Or looking like you took some time to do your hair and makeup? I like my brush, thankyouverymuch, and I don't particularly want to look like I've got a crazy case of bedhead.
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Emmanuelle Alt is very stylish and cool, but I find her style a little bit boring.
I don't know. I'm probably just being silly about the whole thing, but there are just so many articles about it. Google "how to dress like a French girl" - there are 65 million+ results, and it seems like most of them come down to looking like you don't really care about what you look like.
In a weird way, it's kind of reflective of our society. Does anyone remember the backlash against Anne Hathaway in the run-up to the Oscars? People absolutely hated her for a while, mostly because they felt like she was trying too hard to make them like her. Why do we instinctively recoil when someone seems too eager to please? And in terms of fashion and beauty, I think we might have a tendency to assume that any effort that a women makes to look good is made on behalf of others. We don't want people to think that we care too much about what they think; hence, "effortlessness."
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I think Dita von Teese actually had some words of wisdom about this. I can't find the quote right now, but she was talking about the beauty standard of the California golden girl - tall, slim, and tan, with long blonde hair, rocking the natural look and a pair of cutoffs. She felt like she couldn't live up to that standard, but she could craft her own kind of beauty. It's distinctly not natural, but it's beautiful all the same.

How to dress for a date like a Parisienne
Jeans and a leather jacket. And your lips need to be red from making out with someone else beforehand, not because you put on lipstick or anything fancy like that.
The problem with French girl style, according to a Chanel muse
The problem with it is that it's too perfect, and they don't take enough risks.
How to Instagram like a French girl
Include the Eiffel Tower and a Chanel bag in as many shots as possible.
French women don't get wasted
Not only do they not get fat, they don't get too drunk either. And they spend their time at parties discussing the history and architecture of the buildings where they're sipping bubbly.
How to be Parisian wherever you are
The phrase "always be fuckable" appeared in this article. Most of the time my attitude is more "don't fuck with me." Clearly the only part of being French that I'm cut out for is the cheese.

11 comments:

  1. I think being in Spain right now means I'm missing some of these tedious articles... Agreed this is a cliche that should die a death already. Considering we've got fashion bloggers all over the world proving they've got just as much style as a Parisian decked in Chanel...

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    1. Agreed! Style is something that comes from within, and anyone can have it. Attaching it to one particular nationality seems like it discounts the style that all of those British/Australian/Peruvian/Chinese/etc ladies are putting out into the world.

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  2. As much as I am a total Francophile (and adore French actresses - both contemporary and from the past) I do understand what you mean about that 'not-so-effortless effortless chic' that magazines bang on about! Personally, I find most of my style inspiration comes from fellow vintage bloggers and Instagrammers rather than from within magazines :)

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    1. Personally, I think bloggers and IGers are as guilty of the "effortless" myth as anyone, but I think the vintage loving ladies are a little bit better about it than most other fashion types.

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  3. Fantastic topic and post, dear gal! I swear, I've had that same thought before, too, but reckoned I was just about the only one out there. I admire the so-called French style, especially in its more traditional sense, and am not adverse to channelizing elements of it (Breton tops, berets, slept in smokey eyes) every now and then, but as much as I love France and French culture, I tend to be much more of an Anglophile and that extends to my sartorial choices, too (where being eclectic, accessorizing like there's no tomorrow, and looking intentionally put together and "made up" are all key components for me!).

    ♥ Jessica

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    1. I actually really love the hallmarks of French style - I wear Breton striped shirts on a regular basis, and I have a beret that should be coming in the mail pretty soon. It's just the way it's held up as some kind of gold standard, and I feel like that restricts personal style somewhat. I feel like we should all be making it up, really. :)

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  4. Hahahahahahah girl you are so funny and your title TOTALLY drew me in. I'm SUPER not interested in "minimalist chic" when bloggers/magazines/mainstream outlets write about it like that is a superior way of living/dressing. Like, excuse me, no thank you! Your "how to Instagram like a French girl" cracked me up too. I'm obsessed with you.

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    1. I think you do a really good Maximalist Chic, personally! And you're so sweet, I love your blog just as much.

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  5. This was a brilliant post, it made me laugh and nod in agreement to some of your eloquently put points! ('Clearly the only part of being French that I'm cut out for is the cheese'!!)

    Now I have to confess - I am one of those annoying people who has written a blog post about French style, and often witters on about trying to be 'more French'. It harks back to a decade or so ago, when me and one of my sisters were having a down-in-the-dumps time about the way we looked (not helped by gloomy British weather), when we stumbled into this shop that was all so very...French. We bought sparkly shoes and lace trimmed twinsets and vowed to 'be more French'. It cheered us up for ages, and since then I suppose I've romanticised it a bit. Especially since Carrie went to Paris in Sex and The City.

    Anyway, these days I too love the so called hallmarks of French style (berets, trench coats) and I love French beauty products, so I am a terrible offender of loving the French stuff. (Even though the only time I have spent in France was 45 minutes on a runway while we waited for refuelling, on Bastille Day, when the refueller man had gone fishing...)

    I suppose I have picked the best bits of the French stuff, and ignore all the stuff I don't approve of, like infidelity, smoking, and not getting drunk.

    And it doesn't mean I don't appreciate other cultures and their styles - I think in the UK we are very individual to a greater extent than the French, which suits me just fine.

    I've rambled on a bit now, but basically, yes, too many articles banging on about the same thing, maybe I'll write one about being British, drunk, and having a pot belly, but with perfectly brushed hair...

    P x

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    1. I would totally read your article about being a drunk Brit with a potbelly and great hair. I mean, that's Kate Middleton right now, isn't it?

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  6. Dude, I totally feel you, but this shit is a part of me that I can't even help. I mean, I grew up surrounded by European women. My mom was raised by an ex-aristocrat, as my grandmother was an heiress and her family was part of the nobility before the wars. She spoke French, she was an artist, had 5 husbands. She never really adjusted to being a regular person, and aristocracy is all about the effortless-chic-thing. Lots of "rules" for what's classy, what's tacky. That was my childhood. My mom was obsessed with Brigid Bardot, too. She termed the style an "artistic mess" and she encouraged me to do less to my hair and wear less makeup. As I get older, I love effortless chic more and more. I guess the matriarchs succeeded. Like, that photo of Emmanuelle Alt? I basically have that outfit and wear it all the time. Like, that's what my wardrobe looks like. Hahaha. But that's what I look for in clothes...great-looking basics in neutral colors, good cuts, good quality, a few statement pieces, stripes, a bit undone. Plus, it's got a bit of tomboyishness to it that I love. Anyway, regardless of how much of a silly hipster I am and how many stupid denim shirts I own (so many), I will say that there are parts of francocentric style that I absolutely swear by regardless of what my style preferences are at that moment. Red lips, straight bangs and big, teased, Bardot hair are permanent parts of me and I think they're classics. Stripes will never go out of style. Also, something that's very French that my grandmother and mother have always taught me is: either statement eyes, or statement lips. Never both. French food is also my #1 favorite, so...oh my god, I even made croque madame for dinner last night. Okay, I suck. Clearly I'm a Francophile. Damn it. Thanks for helping me pass away this Tuesday without doing any work. Hahaha.

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